In case you need an excuse, May is masterbation month... so do you part and spank one out!
In our climate of sexual awareness, it's hard to believe how it all started:
In 1994 Surgeon General Jocelyn Elders gave a speech at the United Nations world AIDS day.
During follow up questions, she was asked if masturbation was useful as a way of discouraging risky sexual activity among young people. She responded "I think it is something that is part of human sexuality and a part of something that perhaps should be taught".
She was promptly fired by then president Bill Clinton. (Are you freaken kidding!).